Would things be easier if only your co-parent changed a bit?
Why focusing on filling up your own cup may be more important.
I love how family mediator Louisa Whitney put it:
"A commonly held view in separation is that things would be easier if your ex-partner, your co-parent, would change a bit.
👂 Maybe listen more?
👍 Maybe be a bit more co-operative?
🤝 Engaged?
😉 Follow your direction a little more?"
We discuss this idea in a video below. We also talk about how we need to fill up our own cups to ensure that we come at our role in all the relationships we have (co-parenting, romantic, parental etc.) from the best possible place - and we acknowledge that this can be challenging!
We spoke about:
01:02 Self-care vs self-nourishment
04:22 How having a full or an empty cup can change your experience of relationships
06:30 2 ways in which going through separation can empty your cup
07:14 A story about successfully handling a tricky handover even when with an empty cup 13:30 Re-defining your relationship with the other parent
15:40 How parenting with an empty cup can make you more susceptible to triggers
17:00 Simple practice to fill up your cup