An easy-to-follow step-by-step process to help your children feel safe and loved

Circle of Security Parenting

Do you worry that separation will leave a dent in how your children are feeling about themselves and relationships?

Do you want to know how to keep your children’s world intact as you move through separation and build a new life?

Negatives of the separation can be glaringly obvious, so let’s have a look at what good can come out it: 

  • We know that conflict between parents impacts children more than separation, and some parents find it easier to get along once they are separated.

  • If parents can maintain a working co-parenting relationship, children can learn that relationships can transform and evolve.

  • Regardless of how the co-parenting turns out, children can learn that everyone deserves happy and healthy relationships.

  • Separation can bring relief to children.

  • When parents are no longer consumed by problems in the relationship, they can be more present with their children and focus on their relationship with their children.

I tried different approaches in my post-separation parenting journey. Initially, my focus was on managing the logistics of separation:

  • Creating new routines

  • Ensuring smooth transitions between homes

  • Learning to manage my time

 

It was important to put these pieces into place and we were doing all right, but I could not shake off the sense that I was sliding on the surface and did not know how our children were really feeling. It shifted when I moved my focus from managing logistics to being present with my children and in our relationship. It sounds obvious now, but it took me a while to get there.  The more I did that, the more I knew that I was helping our children feel safe, loved, understood, accepted, and comfortable in their skin.

Focusing on relationship helped me to develop an approach to parenting after separation that is based on understanding each unique relationship between a parent and a child. Separation does not happen in a vacuum. It takes place in the context of an intricate web of relationships that have been developing and taking shape for many years, generations even. Each parent-child relationship has its strengths and struggles that were already present before separation. It shapes how parents go about supporting their children. That’s why following generic advice is a great starting point, but will only go so far. Understanding their unique relationship helps parents to:

  • Lean into their strengths and make the most of what naturally comes easily for them

  • Focus their time and energy on learning parenting skills that will help them to strengthen their relationship 

 

When parents focus on nurturing their relationship with their children, they find it much easier to make supportive decisions about managing life after separation.

Working on my parenting with Una has been an incredibly deep and healing experience. Her very soft loving and realistic approach has helped me go through the struggles more smoothly, understand my child's need better and appreciate even more the good moments with her. It has allowed me to be kinder to myself as a parent.  I'm very grateful and wish I had met her sooner.

Circle of Security Parenting course is an easy-to-follow step-by-step process designed to strengthen the sense of security in your relationship. You will be learning the skills that will help you to:

  • Confidently approach difficult conversations with your child 

  • Help your children to express what is going for them and manage their intense emotions (for example sadness, frustration, disappointment, anger)

  • Understand what is driving your children's challenging behaviour and how you can help them to be more in control of their behaviour choices

  • Manage your triggers and stay feeling confident, steady and calm.

I know that in the years to come you can look back at how you met this challenge and feel grateful for how your relationship grew since then.

to explore if Circle of Security Parenting is for you

The Difference that Makes a Difference

After 60 years of research we know that the more secure children are, the more they are able to:

  • Enjoy more happiness with their parents

  • Feel less anger at their parents

  • Turn to their parents for help when in trouble

  • Solve problems on their own

  • Get along better with friends

  • Have lasting friendships

  • Solve problems with friends

  • Have better relationships with brothers and sisters

  • Have higher self-esteem

  • Know that most problems will have an answer

  • Trust that good things will come their way

  • Trust the people they love

  • Know how to be kind to those around them

Cooper, Hoffman and Powell; Circle of Security International, 2018)

Course details

Duration of the course: We will cover the course material in 12 weekly or fortnightly term-time sessions. The content is delivered via videos, graphics and plenty of time for reflection and discussions that will help you seamlessly weave your insights into your day-to-day parenting. The length of each session is one hour. 

Participants: you can take the course on your own or with other people that are important in your children's life.

Support available between sessions:

  • You will start by filling in a detailed questionnaire that will help us to hit the ground running

  • I will be available to support you via email and voice messages in between each session

  • You will have a course workbook that highlights the key points covered in each session and helps you to stay focused on the current step

Location: we can meet online or in Forest Row, East Sussex, UK.

Payment options:

  • 6 monthly payments of £175

  • 3 monthly payments of £345

  • 1 payment of £995

 

Bookingsif you are ready to get started visit the shop to sign up. Once you sign up, you’ll receive:

  • Welcome questionnaire

  • Confirmation of our first session

  • Your course workbook will arrive in the post

  • Access to email and voice message support

to explore if Circle of Security Parenting is for you